{"id":8881,"date":"2026-08-29T20:46:11","date_gmt":"2026-08-29T20:46:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/newstoday365.today\/?p=8881"},"modified":"2026-08-29T20:46:11","modified_gmt":"2026-08-29T20:46:11","slug":"three-unforgettable-moments-when-drunk-people-thought-they-had-everyone-completely-fooled","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/newstoday365.today\/?p=8881","title":{"rendered":"Three Unforgettable Moments When Drunk People Thought They Had Everyone Completely Fooled"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

1. The Drunk Husband Who Noticed Too Much<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

A woman was secretly spending time with her lover when she suddenly heard the front door open.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Her husband was home.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The lover immediately panicked as he heard unsteady footsteps coming down the hallway.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cDon\u2019t move,\u201d the woman whispered. \u201cHe\u2019s completely drunk. He won\u2019t even realize you\u2019re here.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A moment later, her husband stumbled into the bedroom. He could barely keep his eyes open. Without looking around, he dropped onto the bed, muttered a few unintelligible words, and quickly appeared to pass out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The woman quietly relaxed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Maybe they had gotten away with it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But a few minutes later, the husband slowly opened his eyes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He stared toward the end of the bed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

His expression suddenly changed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHoney,\u201d he said, \u201cwhy are there six feet sticking out from the end of this bed? There are supposed to be only four!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The woman froze for a second before forcing a calm smile.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou’re imagining things,\u201d she said. \u201cYou’re so drunk you can’t count properly. Get out of bed and look again from the other side.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The husband groaned as he climbed out of bed and staggered toward the foot of the mattress.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He squinted.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Then he began counting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOne\u2026 two\u2026 three\u2026 four.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He paused.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOh.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He turned around.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou’re right.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The wife smiled, relieved that the danger had passed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Meanwhile, the lover remained completely motionless, silently grateful that the husband’s drunkenness had somehow prevented what could have been a very uncomfortable explanation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Neither of them expected the man who was too drunk to walk straight to be the one who nearly solved the entire mystery.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

2. The Fisherman Who Thought God Was Talking to Him<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

A slightly drunk fisherman was sitting on a frozen lake, hoping to catch some fish beneath the ice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He drilled a hole and leaned over to look into the dark water.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Suddenly, a powerful voice echoed from above.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThere are no fish down there.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The fisherman jumped and looked around.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nobody was nearby.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He assumed someone was playing a joke on him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So he packed up his things, walked a little farther across the ice, and drilled another hole.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Once again, just as he leaned over to look, the same mysterious voice called out:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThere are no fish down there.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Now the fisherman was confused.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He looked around the empty frozen lake.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Maybe he’d simply chosen the wrong location.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So he walked another twenty yards away and drilled a third hole.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Before he could even properly inspect it, the voice boomed again:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThere are no fish down there!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The fisherman stared nervously at the sky.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cGod?\u201d he asked. \u201cIs that you?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The voice answered immediately:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cNo, you idiot. It’s the rink manager. You’re drilling holes in the hockey rink!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Suddenly, the lack of fish made a lot more sense.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

3. The Drunk Driver With Every Excuse<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

A police officer pulled over a driver who had been swerving all over the road.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

As the officer approached the vehicle, he immediately noticed that the driver was having trouble sitting upright.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cSir,\u201d the officer said, \u201cI need you to blow into this breathalyzer.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The driver looked worried.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI can’t do that, officer. I’m asthmatic. Blowing into that thing could trigger a serious asthma attack.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The officer sighed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cFine. Then you’ll need to come to the station for a blood test.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The man shook his head.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI can’t do that either. I’m a hemophiliac. If you take my blood, I could bleed to death.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The officer stared at him, becoming increasingly suspicious.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThen we’ll need a urine sample.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The driver immediately shook his head again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI’m sorry, officer. I’m diabetic. That could cause my blood sugar to drop dangerously low.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

By now, the officer was losing his patience.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He rubbed his forehead and stared at the man.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOkay. Then get out of the car and walk this straight white line.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The driver looked at the line.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Then he looked back at the officer.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI can’t do that.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The officer threw his hands into the air.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOf course you can’t! And what medical condition is stopping you from walking?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The driver paused.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He looked the officer straight in the eyes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And finally gave the one answer that made all his excuses completely unnecessary.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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